


Go Fish

by Xochiquetzl



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-04-22
Updated: 2003-04-22
Packaged: 2017-10-03 05:56:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xochiquetzl/pseuds/Xochiquetzl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack. Daniel. Beer. Fishing. Books in peril.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Go Fish

**Author's Note:**

> This story originally appeared in Pretense 1 from Ashton Press.

Jack cast his line into the lake, then sighed and took a sip of beer. At least Daniel wasn't as bored as Teal'c had been, but that was simply because Daniel had brought books. Plural. Daniel was lying on a blanket in the shade with one of said books, now. Jack idly supposed that he should be grateful that all of his competition for Daniel's attentions thus far appeared to be hardbound volumes that would likely be more effective than Sominex to Jack, but really, the whole idea of taking someone fishing was to have someone to hang out with. Preferably naked. Sharing that whole quiet, relaxed thing. Naked. Granted, they were both quiet and relaxed, but did Daniel have to be quiet and relaxed all the way over there? **Not** naked. Jack reeled his line back in, laid the pole carefully on the dock, and retrieved another beer from the cooler before wandering over to Daniel's shady blanket cum study hall.

"Whatcha doin'?" Jack asked.

"Reading," Daniel replied absently. Jack held the beer between Daniel's face and the page. "Um, no thank you."

"You could sit with me," Jack suggested.

"It's too hot," Daniel said, distracted, still reading.

"You could..." Jack licked his lips for emphasis, before carefully enunciating, "strip down."

"I'd get sunburned," Daniel retorted, not looking up from his book.

"I could rub sunscreen all over your body," Jack offered.

Daniel's brow furrowed, then he actually put his book down and looked at Jack. "This isn't... um, fishing doesn't make you..."

"Horny," Jack supplied. "No, breathing makes me horny. Your lying here with your nose in a book simply begging to be distracted is just bonus."

"I'm **not** begging to be distracted!" Daniel retorted. "This happens to be a fascinating..."

"Wanna make out in the great outdoors?" Jack interrupted.

"Discreet," Daniel observed.

"No neighbors," Jack retorted. "But fine, we can make out in the great indoors if you prefer."

"Or I could finish this chapter."

"You're cheating on me!" Jack faux-sobbed melodramatically. "With a goddamned **book**!"

"Jack," Daniel sighed exasperatedly.

"Punkin?" Jack replied with a smirk.

Daniel winced. "Must you?"

"What? 'Punkin'?" Jack asked innocently. "Do I have to save that pet name for when we're in bed, pookums?"

"'Pookums'?" Daniel choked.

"Woogums," Jack enunciated with wicked relish.

"Studmuffin," Daniel retorted.

"I like that! Will you call me 'studmuffin' in bed, woogums?"

"I most certainly will not," Daniel said, blinking in horrified disbelief. Okay, it was pretty funny, but **sheesh**!

"Aww, c'mon," Jack coaxed, grinning evilly. "Darling, angel."

"Jack..."

"Call me 'studmuffin' again, sweetheart."

Daniel sighed.

"Sugar. Honey_. Bubeleh. Querida mia. Mon petit chou."_

"You do realize that _'mon petit chou'_ literally means 'my little cabbage,' don't you?" Daniel pointed out, evading the barrage of endearments behind a linguistic shield.

"Cool! Can you talk dirty to me in twenty-three languages, Dr. Jackson?"

"Do you speak any languages other than English?" Daniel observed pointedly.

"I'm fluent in baby talk, my little cabbage," Jack noted.

"So I noticed. They don't teach college-level baby talk, you know."

"I know '_Voulez-vous couchet avec moi_?'"

"Typical. You're incorrigible, you know."

"Corrige me, _mon cher_! Corrige me like I've never been corriged before!"

"Jack..." Daniel sighed, then complained, "I'm not going to finish this book, am I?"

"Would this seduction have gone better if I'd started it by getting naked, pookums?" Jack asked. "We can rewind and try it again..." Jack tunelessly hummed the stripper song off key and tossed his hat aside, then started unbuttoning his shirt...

"I'll do anything if you just don't hum," Daniel winced.

"Oh, really?" Jack observed dangerously, waggling his eyebrows.

"No!" Daniel said hastily.

Jack started humming and unbuttoning again.

"Yes! Stop!"

"So, this means I can have my evil, wicked way with you?" Jack asked.

Daniel sighed heavily as Jack put his hands on his shirt buttons and looked threatening. "Fine!"

"'Fine,'?" Jack complained, radiating hurt. "You can't muster any more enthusiasm than 'fine'?" He tried out the big sad puppy eyes.

Daniel gave Jack a withering look.

"I'm going to go inside and sulk now," Jack observed, big brown puppy eyes full of reproach.

"Have fun!" Daniel picked up his book again. Jack stomped off to the cabin.

'Woogums'?

Daniel sighed and stared at his book, shook his head to clear it, and returned to his chapter.

Chapter end and--Daniel looked around--no sign of Jack. Typical. Well, the next chapter had to be more entertaining than a sulky Jack. Although a darkly plotting Jack was cause for concern. Ready for anything, Daniel decided to keep a careful watch and cautiously went back to his reading.

Part way through the next chapter Daniel heard the cabin door slam. Of course. Just when he was getting his focus back. He made a point of not looking up. Then Jack flopped down on the blanket next to him.

"Want some ice cream?" Jack asked.

"Yes, actually, I..." Daniel trailed off as he turned to see that Jack was naked, clutching a carton of ice cream and a spoon. One spoon. "Phish Food?"

"It's not about the Phish, per se, it's about the sex," Jack pointed out calmly. "If you want ice cream, you're going to have to eat it off me, little Phishies and all."

Daniel burst out laughing. "Are you completely shameless?"

"Yeah," Jack agreed amiably, rolling onto his stomach and dropping a spoonful of ice cream into the small of his back. "Damn! That's cold!"

Daniel reached for the spoon.

"Nuh-uh. No spoon. On me," Jack retorted, tucking the spoon under his body.

"I must be out of my mind," Daniel muttered before leaning down to lap up the melting ice cream and marshmallow... they really were little Phishies... pooling in the small of Jack's back, Jack's breathing quickening.

"Want some more?" Jack offered generously.

"I **want** the spoon," Daniel complained.

"Nope," Jack said. "No spoon." He scooped out another spoonful, at which point a wrestling match ensued for the spoon, sending ice cream hurtling into the lake. "Dammit!" Jack protested. "Now look what you made me do! I Free Willied the damned Phish!"

"Give me that spoon!" Daniel demanded.

"No way!" Jack retorted smugly, pinning Daniel down. "Ooh, can I suck Phishies off your tackle?" he leered.

"I am **not** taking my clothes off outdoors!" Daniel insisted.

"Hmm. Pissy AND prudish? It's a good look on you. Soo, where do you want me to put the ice cream this time?" Jack answered with a smirk. Daniel started laughing again.

"Jack, I am not performing lewd and lascivious acts on your front lawn for ice cream. I have my limits. Your back is one thing. Where I imagine you're thinking of putting ice cream--which sounds terribly uncomfortable, by the way--is another."

"I'm really hurt that, um..." Jack glanced down at the book cover, "The Antisymmetry of Syntax is more fascinating than I am. And what the hell does that mean, anyway?"

"He's theorizing that phrase structure determines linear order and..."

"Yadda!"

"It's less **annoying** than you are at the moment," Daniel grumbled.

"Fine," Jack snapped. "I'm taking my ice cream inside, where I'm going to perform lewd and lascivious acts on the Phish all by myself." There was a pause, during which he watched Daniel for signs of resistance.

"You're still sitting here," Daniel observed. "Don't let me stop you. By all means, take care of your little problem alone and quit driving me crazy."

"'Little'?" Jack flounced into the cabin, radiating offense.

Daniel wondered for the millionth time in the month he and Jack had been together what he'd been thinking. If he'd known he'd be letting himself in for...

For Jack doing the Meg Ryan in the cabin.

"Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Uh huh! Oh **yeah**!" Jack's voice carried a little too easily out of the cabin and to Daniel's blanket. He HAD to be faking it. He was never that loud. Okay, almost never. "**OH GOD**!"

Silence. Blessed silence. Daniel turned his attention back to The Antisymmetry of Syntax.

The cabin door opened. "Um, Danny?" Jack called sheepishly.

Daniel sighed heavily. "Yes?"

"Are, um, body fluids bad for books?"

Daniel froze. "You didn't."

"Well, they were on your nightstand, and, um, it looks like The Genesis of Language: a Psycholinguistic Approach took the brunt of it, but The Sounds and Colors of Power: The Sacred Metallurgical Technology of Ancient West Mexico got some, and there's also that really old looking..."

"Argh!" Daniel leapt to his feet and raced into the bedroom to find his books safe, sound, and devoid of body fluids. Jack slammed the door behind him.

"Sucker!" Jack called playfully.

"You wish!" Daniel retorted tartly.

"Is that an offer?" Jack asked lasciviously.

Daniel ground his teeth and glared.

"Annoyed?" Jack sympathized.

"Very," Daniel grumbled.

"You should burn off some of that tension. I have just the thing in mind..." Jack suggested.

Daniel glared in infuriated disbelief, speechless. Jack leered. Daniel stared. Jack waggled his eyebrows suggestively. Daniel seethed. Jack smirked.

Daniel shoved Jack into the door and kissed him, then pulled away to glare at Jack accusingly. "Get in bed!" Daniel growled.

Jack cheerfully bounded into bed in a single gazelle-like leap. "What are you going to do to me?" he asked playfully, bouncing.

"I **should** bend you over my knee," Daniel commented, stripping off his clothes with ruthless efficiency.

"I'll try anything once, Studmuffin," Jack shrugged, visibly revelling in the sight of flawless skin being unveiled.

"Hm, on second thought, no. And **please** don't call me 'Studmuffin.'"

"Well, I hope you're not just going to stand there and look threatening, 'cause Big Bad Mad Daniel really makes me hot," Jack observed. "And you can call **me** 'Studmuffin' if you want."

"Jack?" Daniel started pleasantly, climbing into bed. "Shut up."

"Give me something better to do with my mouth," Jack retorted, before Daniel silenced him with a kiss.

Daniel pulled away and gave Jack a dirty look. "What am I going to do with you?"

"Actually, I had something in mind, punkin," Jack started.

"Of course you did," Daniel sighed.

"Well, sweetie, it **is** our one-month anniversary. I was thinking that it might be fun to mark the occasion with you nailing me."

"That's... romantic. I think," Daniel observed in amazement. "And here I thought you were just being randomly obnoxious."

"Nah, I'm being a special occasion pain in the ass." Jack grinned mischievously.

"'Nail you'?" Daniel asked skeptically.

"Sure! A first time to commemorate a first time!"

"While I admit it has a certain dark logic..."

"What?" Jack challenged.

"What if it's bad? If you're trying to celebrate our one-month anniversary--which, let me add, is vaguely alarming--maybe we should stick to something, um, you know, tried and true."

"Aw, that's sweet, punkin!"

Daniel winced visibly. "Jack, please."

Jack sighed. "You don't have to, of course. I just thought it'd be fun." He grinned evilly. "And I think it's adorable that you want our anniversary to be special."

"Sugar shock!" Daniel groaned.

"Sorry, I really had my heart set on your nailing me. Well," he added thoughtfully, "that, or bad Madonna karaoke."

"Please tell me you brought lube," Daniel pleaded.

Jack beamed from ear to ear and got up to dig in his suitcase, singing, "I made it through the wilderness, somehow I made it through..."

"Ja-a-ack!" Daniel protested.

"Didn't know how lost I was until I found you," Jack sang, flopping down on the bed and handing Daniel the lube bottle.

"Jack, I'm begging you. Don't sing!"

"I was beat, incomplete, I'd been had, I was sad and blue, but you made me feel, yeah, you made me feel shiny and new..." Jack writhed in an excellent imitation of Madonna on the barge in Venice.

"Jack!"

"Like a virgin, hey! Touched for the very first time..."

"Do you want to have sex or not? because if you keep singing I'm..."

"Shutting up now, darling," Jack said hastily, looking chastened.

Daniel gave Jack a long, suspicious look, then opened the lube bottle.

"Like a vir-ir-ir-irgin, when your heart beats next to mine!" Jack sang quickly and quietly.

Daniel let out a long, martyred sigh.

"Sorry."

"Are not," Daniel accused.

"Gonna give you all my love, boy. My fear is fading fast," Jack sang with renewed enthusiasm.

"I want you to know how terrifying I find it that you know the lyrics to this song," Daniel observed.

"Been saving it all for you, 'cause only love can last. You're so fine, and you're mine. I'll be yours 'til the end of time..."

Daniel decided that the best way to shut Jack up was to seize the moment, the initiative, and Jack's dick. Sure enough, he had immediate success. Holding Jack's gaze, he moved down Jack's body without breaking eye contact. "Jack? I don't care if it's Madonna or Handel's Messiah, if you sing while I'm doing this, I'm out of here," Daniel threatened before delicately running his tongue lightly up, around, and down Jack's aching hardness.

"Danny..." Jack breathed. Daniel glanced up mischievously and gave Jack a nervous little smile before returning to his long, slow licking, slipping a slick finger inside him. Jack reached down to where Daniel's hand was resting on his hip and twined their fingers together, giving Daniel's hand a squeeze. Daniel looked up and smiled before abruptly taking as much of Jack as he could into his mouth, slipping two fingers into and reaching up, curving, pressing. Jack wondered yet again what Daniel ever had to be nervous about in bed before lapsing into moaning, panting, writing incoherence, Daniel pleasuring him mercilessly until Jack howled his release.

Daniel moved up to kiss Jack gently. "Are you sure you want to...?" he asked softly. Jack made an impatient noise. Daniel bit his lip nervously. "Because I really want to finish that chapter. I can't resist theories on word order and phrase structure."

_Pervert. _"Don't **make** me sing again," Jack threatened.

Daniel burst out laughing. "You wouldn't dare!"

"You're so fine and you're mine. Make me strong, yeah you make me bold. Oh your love thawed out, yeah, your love thawed out what was scared and cold," Jack sang.

"You remember which verse you left off on? You **PRICK**!" Daniel snarled, snatching up the lube bottle. "'Scared and cold'? As if!"

"Like a virgin, touched for the very first time. Like a virgin with your heartbeat next to mine." Jack watched Daniel hungrily, then rolled over and wiggled his ass in the air. "Come on, Danny. Give it to me or I'll keep singing."

Daniel piled pillows under Jack's hips, grumbling, pushing Jack's hips into the best position, stretching out to kiss Jack's nape as he slowly pressed his way into Jack, at which point he forgot to breathe, let alone be annoyed. "Is that...?"

"It's good," Jack reassured. And it **was** good, if kind of pushing the boundaries of what he thought he could handle--fingers were one thing but Danny was **big**, so much more noticeably big than he seemed in Jack's mouth, but it was so very good. Daniel let out a nervous little sigh. "Go on," Jack encouraged. "Nice and slow." Daniel started moving, gently, feathering light kisses on the back of Jack's neck and shoulders. "Mm, Danny..."

After a terrifying review of related literature (both print and online) caused a dizzying descent into strongly phrased caution hell, Daniel was profoundly relieved that he seemed to be doing this right, if Jack's moaning and squirming were anything to go by. Even the normally-upbeat Good Vibrations Guide to Sex used the word "excruciating," but with Jack making it crystal clear a good time was being enthusiastically had by all, maybe it was time the all included him. "I love you," he whispered huskily into Jack's ear, following the words with his tongue.

Jack decided that getting fucked was just about the single best idea that had ever occurred to anyone. He was wanting more now, wanting to be completely filled with Daniel, wanting all Danny could give him, pushing back in counterpoint to Danny's thrusts. "More," Jack demanded, and Daniel let out this wonderful little gasping sound and gave him more, harder, deeper, moaning in time, soft, slippery skin brushing Jack's back, all sleek muscle and sweat, strength and power. Daniel's hand insinuated itself under Jack to stroke him hard in time, and Jack thrashed and screamed as the universe tumbled into technicolor explosions, still distantly aware of Daniel writhing and arching and crying out behind him as he followed Jack into Elysium.

Jack came back to awareness pinned under his limp lover, Daniel's face in the back of his neck, Daniel's breath panting warm across his skin, Daniel soft but still inside him. He sighed contentedly. "Happy anniversary, darling," he murmured.

"Love you," Daniel breathed into Jack's neck. "Love you. Love you SO much."

Jack grinned from ear to ear, even though Daniel couldn't see it, which was just as well. If he gushed about how much he loved gooey afterglow Daniel, Danny might stop doing it and **then** where would he be? No, the only solution was sex. Lots and lots of sex. Constant sex, interspersed with gooey sticky afterglow Daniel. Given time, he might even strip away Danny's silly inhibitions about sounding like a lovesick teenager. It could happen.

"I hope," Daniel murmured, trying to sound dry and failing, "that this means the Madonna nightmare is over."

It had served its purpose, but Jack wasn't about to admit that. "You're just lucky I didn't bring the blonde wig," Jack retorted sleepily. "I'll save the Dragaoke for when we get back."


End file.
